Dear Tech Support:


Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 . I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activities, such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Going To The Pub 7.5, and Softball 3.6

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my other favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 .


Please help!

Thanks,
Troubled User.....

_____________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men often complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 , thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge, the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings: Alimony-Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application Yes Dear 2.7 to alleviate your program problems.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance! Wife 1.0 does come with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5, and Do Bills 4.2

However, be very careful how you use these programs . Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,
Tech Support

LMAO!

There is certainly some truth to that joke.

Personally, after trying out Wife 1.0 for ten years, which included repeated use of the C:\APOLOGIZE! command, as well as numerous attempts at utilizing the Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 applications, I finally discovered the life-saving Divorce 10.0 application.






(Anybody who knows how my last five years have gone while using the Divorce 10.0 application, will be immediately aware of how filled with viruses my Wife 1.0 certainly was, because although Divorce 10.0 is still not a perfect application, I would still not re-install Wife 1.0)

Click the picture to enlarge



2008 Pascal Elie

A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room when a young
woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting
a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. It
was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so
she was scheduled for immediate surgery. When she was
completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed
that her pubic hair had been dyed green, and above it there was
a tattoo that read, 'Keep off the grass.' Once the surgery was
completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's
dressing, which said, 'Sorry, had to mow the lawn'
Submitted by RN no name
AND FINALLY!!!.. ......... .....

"What time does the library open?" the man on the phone asked.
"Nine A.M." came the reply. "And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?"
"Not until nine A.M.?" the man asked in a disappointed voice.
"No, not till nine A.M.!" the librarian said. "Why do you want to get in before nine A.M.?"
"Who said I wanted to get in?" the man sighed sadly. "I want to get out."

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